15th December, 2014

I saw this story posted by Empower People and a rage started building up inside against those fuckers. As much as I love to be calm and peaceful about things; THIS was too much. Perhaps it was a personal tipping point for all the fucknesses I'd been hearing of lately and the mild ones I'd experienced and seen through my time on Earth that actually fucked me up a bit inside; although now I can proudly declare that although I've taken my time, I have healed enough to be able to share my views unashamedly.

It's also the first time I chose to use swear words publicly and unabashedly so. But just raging within was not enough. I had to DO something; I had to get that rage outta me lest it scorch ze own to ashes. So I let it simmer awhile within wondering if it was uncalled for, wondering if I was being unnecessarily outraged. NOPE. Not at all.

Gradually a series of constructive thoughts started building up inside and an early morning walk in the park followed by some lone time with ze rage on a bench surrounded by greens was enough for it all to start spilling into ze phone and here's sharing with you what I now feel is not as destructive as it could have been otherwise.

I'm not sure if I should edit out the swear words which I find quite redundant now but I'll let 'em be for now and will decide to edit them out later (or not).

The safest (not mindlessly hurtful) prompt that I could share alongside the link on my own wall was this:
How do we prevent such fucknesses from taking birth in gangs of stupidity?
Where does such inhumane cowardly jerky behaviour come from?

But this was not enough to calm the rage inside;
There had to be more~
And there indeed was.
Proceed only at the possible risk of getting scorched yerself.
Don't come crying to me later.
So....... take a deep breath AND here goes:
The unedited version of what poured forth of the rage inside in the park outside.

~~~~~~~X( WARNING: Not for the faint-hearted and/or the narrow minded X)~~~~~~~
X)~~~~~~~ Because beards growing from the chin under are safer than the fumes rising from the head above ~~~~~~~X(

I really don't mind being the god of hell to burn the fuckness outta those fuckers. I really hope these words become arrows and scorch them outta nowhere. They so don't know what to do with their horny dicks. Someone get them an education please! 

| Kutte saale haraami |

How DARE they dare to even touch a child. What joy, what fears drive the poor actions of such foolish ignoramuses? A BIG FAIL. FUCKERS. It's pathetic there ain't no one watching em n grounding those pricks to the point of an almost death for their fucknesses. What kind of families do they come from? What kind of a society allows such blind ignorant brutality to perpetuate? 

| Saale kutte haraami |

It's those fucking parents' and brothers' and husbands' fault that don't let their daughters and sisters and wives stand for themselves and instead weaken them with false assumed fake omnipresent protection.
It's those fucking morons' fault that watch helplessly and let such atrocities occur in broad peoplelight!
It's the raped fucking lady's fault that she was in the wrong place at a wrong time in "wrong" clothes around wrong fucking people.
It's fucking my fault that I neva bothered to engage myself with suchnesses that need not have even an inch of space to exist on Earth.
Not any more.
And I've ended up writing a long fucking essay which is gonna fuck around in yer kawai leetle brain until u find ur way with it. What a fucking irony.

| Haraami saale kutte |

And YOU.
You'd better direct your gaalis sharp and clear toward those fuckers.
We musn't kill em. 
It's not their fault.
It's that fucking society's fault that allows such fuckness to grow and fester. 
It's that fucking media's fault that nurtures such blindness;
overloading em with such fuckness without respite.

I'd have em scorching in Thunderbolt fury until they realise and accept their foolish actions 
and get em to find a way to salvage an already deep-shitted situation.
I'd hunt and find that wee leetle spark in em to help them nurture and let flourish;
to get out of the deepest of deep shit they flung themselves into by their unbridled actions.

I rest my case.
Peace reigns supreme.

Well, that was that and it's out now.
I rest my case too.

Girls and/or Boys!
Gaali on to such fucknesses unabashedly~~~~~~>

Restful Sundays~

A heartfelt salute to thy spirit o sailor~

I'm starting a "Restful Sunday" series where I'll be sending out a mail every Sunday with uniquenesses on earth, one at a time as I'm visited by 'em (or not)~
I don't guarantee what the focus area will be BUT I can guarantee that it will be an assortment of stuff (video/words/image) essentially tending to the well-being of thy wholeness.

Usually, I always add something to whatever I share, be it my own observation or directing thy attention to some particularity;
But with THIS series, I'm going to leave you be with the 'pearl'; to be with, how you will.
And no reply/discussion is expected/required. This has got to be something just between you and the pearl.

To subscribe, please write to restfulsundays@gmail.com with the subject as "Subscribe to Restful Sunday series" so I'll add you to the mailing list.

I hope I have covered the technicalities here.
Have a restful Sunday~

PS: I share this here by assumption on Thunderbolt's part that ze friends here would be keen on suchness. If at any moment you feel that this is not for you then feel free to write to restfulsundays@gmail.com again and simply say "Unsubscribe"; No explanation required. I'd prefer that the pearls arriving in any mail-gadget get the due respect and that the energy goes not to waste.

Thank you AND Shine on*

Let's Get Real.

Hi one! Hi all!

I've got to say that this place here has given me an insight into the me that is boundless and the me that is expansively free and I am so very thankful for this wonderful gift! 

Gradually I began to realise that it was fine enough to go on exploring and expressing but somewhere I started feeling a little fake ataha it started to become like an image-building activity, precisely what I sought out to avoid and in some sense break out of in the first place!

I am coming to see this as a gradual arrival to a point of convergence for the extremes of the spectrum of my life: The "real" life that I earlier lived as Reema Khudkhudia pretty unaware but yearning for the innumerable possibilities of life- something that I discovered through the "dream" life I lived as Captain Thunderbolt, a voice I discovered through expressing in here and exploring out there.

But while the former was so grounded that she could barely move, the latter was flying so untethered that she could barely get anything done. Man can she talk! But a need was felt to put into practice what was so easy to talk about- to actually live the life of her dreams. And that needs work. A LOT OF WORK. So now comes the time for Reema Thunderbolt *applause*

She aims to have one leg firmly grounded and the other one hovering above ground just like Krishna's pose so her life can be a dance, something she'd assumed she could never do.

So hop over right 'ere if thou be interested to have a glimpse: The Leetle Things

Yes it is difficult. VERY. It's like being a baby all over again learning how to be! It involves a lot of crying, desisting, dropping, falling but in the end she knows that this is how it's got to be if she doesn't want to end up living someone else's life.

Hope to see you there! This in no way means that I'm closing off here- I can see myself coming over now and again to channel a poem or a rant or when the Thunderbolt bit in me feels left out haha!

Keep visiting. Here and there or elsewhere as thy inner voice commands~
I wish you all agape!


Hello my dearies!

It's been a long time I have shared anything upfront and 'real', if you get what I mean?
BUT, I have some super-jazz to share with you in this post.
It's a 'game' that 'happened' in a 'random' moment at ze lovely amigo's place.

It goes simply like this:

Step 1: You pick a book.
Step 2: You open a random page.
Step 3: You read a random part.

You just had a heads up from our very own mischievous little, big Universe!

I went for 'The Hobbit' today, a book I share strong camaraderie with;
And it greeted me thusly:

"You need not try", said Thorin. "In fact if you can't talk about something else, you had better be silent. We are quite annoyed enough with you as it is. If you hadn't waked up, we should have left you to your idiotic dreams in the forest; you are no joke to carry even after weeks of short commons."

And I BURST out laughing having a sweet moment of epiphany all to myself. You see, I have been very difficult for myself for a long time (3 months on the severe side to be precise) and as a result have been a big source of worry for the people closest to me. Only yesterday, I made a wee little effort to re-connect to my good old friend and ask for help.
(Didn't think you'd respond this fast! You've been around all along eh ye sneaky?! THANK YOU Krishy!!!)
I've had a really great day considering the dead spell I've been forcing myself through AND I have my family and mi amigo to thank too for having continued faith in me!!!

Before I get overly soppy, Go get your magic moment all for yourself!

A little word of caution: Don't go overdosing on this game lest it loses all meaning. ENJOY!


She says Butterflies
And the butter flies

Flies take shots at butter
Butter melts and drowns em in

Butterflies o butterflies!
Why call you so oh you Paperflies?

Caterpillars o you butterflies!
What pillars you cater to you so-called Butterflies?

Pillars of beauty, pillars of brevity
You take wing only to fly off for eternity!

Where to oh paperfly? Where to!
From pillar catering to flying butter to what o what?

Neti neti

The butter flies and will keep flying
The churn will go on, never ending?

Neti neti

People are People

Was born in Muscat
Parents came from Kutch
Got education in Muscat
Through School (Indian School), met people from various parts of India - from families adhering to different religions, coming from different states and having unique personalities speaking different languages - Individuals of all variety
Communicated in English

Moved to Kutch hoping to settle there
Through School, met people who all spoke Kutchi irrespective of the difference in religion or the place they originally came from - Individuals of all variety again
Communicated in Hindi
Barely two years had gone by and the earthquake sends back to Muscat

Back to the same school, a different bunch of people around, people with different builds yet the same energy - the variety of people!
Finished school and through the last two years, had to figure where to go next.
Ended up in Mumbai.

Through College, met people from all sorts of financial backgrounds irrespective of the variety of places they came from, the languages they spoke or the religions they followed Or not.
Three years gone and flew through focussing only on the matter at hand- so many new things to see and to learn!

Then was introduced to the Web and it opened up the world! So very many people from so very many different places and times; with such a variety of experiences and associated thoughts and feelings and the very many ways of expressing them all!

Feeling the need to get some real understanding before finishing college,
Worked. For a year.
At a place where unexpectedly though blessedly, met people from various parts of India and of the World- People speaking different languages, from different geographical and climatic regions, people with different food habits, with different beliefs and experiences and thought processes- Individuals of all kinds!
Communicated through Expression

Having seen so much, read so much and thought so much;
Sure of one thing- People are people.

They may have different tastes, different thoughts, different ways of being and living but in the end what's common among all is that they are people! With their own set of beliefs coming from their own set of experiences -That nothing is fixed.
There's always scope for improvement. Mostly in oneself. No matter the age/sex/financial standing/societal position/profession; what matters is the sharing of the thoughts, the feelings; the moments of care and love expressed irrespective of anything and everything!

In being with the people immediately around you- whether your 'own' or 'strangers'; there's always scope for improvement when there is a listening and a sharing.
And that's how the world changes. Not by going around worrying and badgering what should change in the world but by looking real close at one's own self and see what can change in oneself. There's always ample room for improvement! It's all a matter of scale.
So, there is really no need to take things in your hands and go around bullying change in everyone's faces or there's no need to even pretend to be okay about everything and then behind the back or in the mind, complain about it all but one can simply walk along one's path and express the truth of moments from moment-to-moment, right then and right there instead of carrying the load along until it becomes too heavy to even move a step further or end up loading it on another which is most often the case.

So it is in these leetle moments, dear people that resides God, where life is really lived~
Because every person matters,
No matter where they come from, no matter what their beliefs;
If a mere smile can light up anyone's world, then why not?



Forget NOT to DIGEST.

Who are so heavy in intent and meaning that every moment for them is an eternity and they take their time savouring it as fully as they can.
When you reach that level, it becomes impossible to take in huge amounts of data because it just cannot do justice to the intensity with which every bit is digested.
The world calls such people slow.
For me, they are soOperfast.
Versus someone like Me.
That has super capacity to take in  huge data at once and then slowly and gradually chew on it and take my time digesting it.
(Who's thinking of cows right this moment? Me. Ahem ahem.)
For the world I am fast;
But in reality I am slow.
Because I gorge on moments while they last and only after they are gone do I begin to savour the experience.
I lag behind in processing the now which the slow guys are actually sOoperfast at.
Get it?
Then there are THOSE.
Who go on gorging without giving themselves a chance to digest anything.
Then they keep bursting in fits of anger and wonder where it comes from.
Those who eat without thinking what they eat and then wonder where the poison came from.
And then there are also THOSE.
who barely eat assuming that there's nothing they're gonna gain from it.
Which category do you think you belong in?
Is there a category I have missed? 
Kindly let me know of it and I'd be grateful for that gift.

All said,
But more importantly,
Give yourself time to DIGEST all that you have eaten.

Holy Cow!

SO! A friend just shared a video on facebook and it inspired the following write up.

I didn't have an answer before but if I were asked about my favorite animal species now, it's got to be cows. Lots of connections have formed past few months with 'em.

There's an interesting thing my mom said about them where they gobble up as much food as they can and then sit and chew and digest it in peace in their own pace. I can totally relate to it with the way I have found myself to be working especially reading.

There is of course the Krishna connection too which in fact drew my attention to them even more especially thanks to those lovely paintings by artist Shubhangi Samant where she'd painted the cows, especially their BIG eyes. with so much love.

I also had this amazing cow moment just when I was returning from my last trip to Kutch. This golden brown cow just came over at my uncle's gate, right when I was leaving for the station and I had an opportunity to pet it, the leetle hump on the back and especially the underside of the neck- the ripples of skin hanging loose- an urge I'd had for quite some time and got renewed the moment I saw cows again roaming the streets of Kutch and this particular one seemed Universe-sent! (Thank you I-didn't-get-a-chance-to-get-to-know-you-properly kindly cow!)

It reminds me of another cow-story from my visit to Kutch. I'd gone with my cousin once to get milk in the morning. I was curious to see how they milk the cow and luckily we had gotten there early (yay!) The calf was having her share and while we waited, the uncle started saying a few interesting things; of which what touched me the most was when in a matter-of-fact manner he said that we are actually stealing the kid's share and that the mother does not give milk to them until she has satisfied her own calf's thirst first. Only then does uncle proceed to milk her so he can have some for him and sell the rest to other families (one being ours). What is even more heartening is that this is a Muslim family and in a place where by default there is an apparent sensitivity around religion matters, LIFE goes on unabatedly! so proud of 'em all! Salute.

I love the considerate manner in which business is carried out as part of life~ Before we took our leave, I went up to the cutesy calf to say hello and she proceeded to lick my arms and surprisingly (for zeself) the milky remnants that she left as a result of that lovely gesture did not matter to me at all! In my mind I noted to myself- This could be easily washed off while the memory of that momentary loving connection will continue to endure~

I am also reminded here of a visual that was created in my mind, way before; where in a book about time, the author had described this scene of roads in India wherein the cows literally stop traffic with their slow-paced chillout munching moments oftentimes right in the middle of the road XD As if saying- "Chillax humans! What's the hurry?"

There is this story I'd read too of a student that had just finished his studies and thought that he knew everything and was ready to teach the world (I sure find myself in that boat now and again too ahem so I am pretty cautious of my own tendencies too. Beat it outta me!) His guru detected his pride and asked him to spend some time with nobody else but cows until he felt some kind of a change in him. The scholar went ahead and spent as much time with them as he could and finally he returned years later and met his Guru again. The Guru asked him- What up dude?! Is there anything you gotta say?! *chuckles* The scholar said No. I'm at peace. The cows were peacefully grazing the lands and munching their food while I kept talking to them about all things of the world. Silent listeners. I feel empty now. And the Guru said: It is now that you are ready for the world~

And then I am reminded of the Slaughter house where I saw cows being herded mercilessly and disrespectfully to go under the knife to make packaged food for the world. Thankfully I didn't see the butchering in action but saw those BIG knives and the belts set in place for "efficient" managing of butchering. Though I did end up seeing a video that hit some part deep inside me with a question- Why make everyone go to so much trouble?

The cows come mostly from farmers who do not have the resources to take care of their own selves and have to part with them to earn an extra buck to feed their wives and kids. Many cows die on their way to the slaughter house itself, what with the jam-packed conditions that they are carried along in, on bumpy roads. Then there are those that die in the slaughter house out of exhaustion of the journey and little care is taken to give them any kind of space or respect for their being.
Well, I know beef is a thing, it's a part of diet for many and if you think you cannot survive without it, I would ask you if you had the guts to butcher the cow yourself and prepare your meal? If you do have the guts for that, I salute to you~ Because at least then there is some dignity of understanding between you and that cow before it becomes food on your plate. I wonder how many butchers talk to the animals they butcher. Well at least then there is space for thankfulness for its sacrifice.

As for milk, I want to reach that stage where I myself have the guts to milk a cow Or I hope to reach a stage where I don't depend on milk in my diet anymore. Because turns out that ALL the milk especially packaged ones come from these factories of cows where they are sucked of their motherhood until they can't give milk anymore. Not to say that it's all bad news. I'm sure there are ways to go about it much more humanely. The trouble really begins when we start mass producing getting into a hurry to meet the demand flux and begin treating living beings like machines. Imagine all that traumatic energy that the food carries from its memory of where it comes from? No wonder then- the rising rates of mental illnesses because it seems that that memory gets imprinted on the intaker's memory and you start wondering perhaps where all the 'trauma' you feel comes from? This is just an idea which may have been worked on but comes in relation to this documentary about water. (Source courtesy: Jeeves Williams)

As for what YOU can do NOW: It's a soOper awesome thing to be thankful before every meal. I never understood myself why religions had these prayers etc. but I am experimenting my own ways of saying thanks and I see that it actually helps you be in the moment, to relish every bite you take when you realise all the work that the food has gone through to reach our plate to feed our hungry tummies. Sooooooo many people to thank! Especially mom and dad until I can stand on my own teenie-weenie feet. It surely makes 'eating' a joyful ritual of the day. I'm still working on it because I do lose my attention when I am occupied with other thoughts but I'm on my way~

Holy cow! After all that has been said and done,
I am reminded of HOBBITS O.O?

23-01-2015: The Plastic Cow
I have an opportunity to work on this project and I hope to make the most of it~


An article on Eve-teasing came across me while I was sailing in the sea of faces (facebook ahem) and it reminded me of an amusing incident from way back in 2011. I shared it there and thought I must share it here too with my lovely friends who care to listen to what I've got to say~

So. I was walking over to my friend's place, by the main road. I was walking speedily (like most of you must know haha) lost in my thoughts and suddenly from nowhere this guy on a bike stops next to me and says something.

I snap out of my thoughts and wondering if he wanted some directions; I asked him gently: Sorry I didn't hear, can you repeat what you said? And he pointed with his eyes to my chest and feverishly said- "Good boobs" and zoomed off and away getting lost in the traffic.

Me? I RAGED and FUMED in my head X( Then realising that the deed was done and there was no use harming myself with such harsh thoughts; I wondered if I had worn anything "wrong" ? I looked down. Fully covered. My conscience said- Nope.

Then I thought, what kind of a guy is that; who stops random strangers|girls and says such unnecessary things to them? Probably his friends had dared him to do this? That could be a possibility.

One look at him also told me that he was the kind of guy that suppressed his sexuality because the society did not allow space for expressing suchness. It also told me that perhaps he had never had a friend who was a girl and was the kind of guy that is scared of talking to girls. Maybe he had a sister but he didn't think that such things could happen to her because he makes sure that his sister wears "safe" clothes so she wouldn't come to "harm". So all girls who are not his sister become free for him to stare at and make lewd remarks at; if not physically but at least in the mind. "Who's watching me anyway? I can get away with it. I haven't done any "REAL" harm no?"

Then I pondered, "Why Universe?! Why would you let this happen to me?" AND I remembered this particular moment that had happened a few months before then.

Now, I've never really watched this series called "Friends" but one fine day, I thought that if everyone's talking so much about it, there's gotta be something in it. Curiosity took over and I happened to watch an episode. In that episode, Rachel has gone to her boyfriend's parents' place for dinner or something; and her dress strap falls off and apparently that was the end for her with that guy. BUT, when she is relaying this news to her friends; they surely EXCLAIM making big Os on their faces! And she calms them down and says: Don't worry. I've got great boobs. And that's the end of that scene.

BUT it's definitely not the end of the trail it left on my mind.That line stuck. And I went O.o How can that girl say that she's got good "boobs" ? Do I have good boobs o.O?

THAT'S IT! Everything connected and I realised that the Universe gave me my answer in the least invasive awkward way possible XD AND I BURST OUT LAUGHING and continued walking with an amused expression like every dawn-of-realisaton moment leaves you with.

You are perfect. Just the way you are. And you're not gonna remain that way forever anyway. Just give yourself time. Watch yourself grow. Don't force anything on yourself. Have faith in the beauty lying dormant within you that shall bloom just when the time is perfect for YOU O:)

This also made me wonder how many such incidents and WORSE must be happening to girls all around? Who are these guys? Where do they come from? And I realised that these are the guys all around me. How do I know what they are doing behind the backs of the people they know? I then decided that day that I'm not gonna watch such nonsense that leaves such unnecessary thoughts on my mind and end up inviting unwanted incidents in my experience. Or if by any chance I happen to see something like that; I must then and there process it and not let any doubt or confusion or question remain for the Universe to answer.

That. My dear girls on Earth, is the most foolproof way for you to be yourself without running the risk of idiots coming in your way. Shine on! Fear not. The Universe has got your back. Next time, you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation, just be kind and tell the guy to watch out for Captain Thunderbolt's FURY ~XD~

Dear guys, I have nothing against you. I have real brothers. I have cousin brothers. I have really awesome guys who have been super AWESOME friends, even more than all the girl-friends put together! I love you all! Just don't go around treating girls like they are some property. They are individuals too. Just as much as you. Treat them with respect as much as you'd like yourself to be respected too!

Phew! Not bad. Another awesome story off my chest.

Sail on mateys! Joyfully! Not creepily PLEASE.